Credible –adjective.
- Capable of being believed; believable
- Worthy of confidence
- What I won’t be in about three weeks
Yup, I have been watching football for the better part of two decades, and what that experience has provided me is as follows: hours and hours of mindless lounging-on-the couch time, slight suicidal tendencies due to a certain team in KC, and a beer belly. Please note that I did not say anything about the ability to predict, with any success, the outcomes of NFL games. But my guess is that you aren’t any good at it either.
So, since I don’t feel like writing about the Royals mini two game winning streak, the anticipation of hockey training camps opening in a week*, or Jason Whitlock’s weight **, I will instead extend an invitation. I will post my weekly predictions here, and keep track of my record. If you think you can guess better than I can, well, here’s your chance to Beat The Logg…
*Actually, I do want to write about hockey; I just don’t think anyone wants to read it. At least not yet.
**He’s fat
Week 1
Pittsburgh (-5.5) over Tennessee: While I think that the Titans have a pretty solid club, and will still be around late into this season, there is just no way that the defending champs are going to lay down at home in the season opener on Thursday night. This pick is as easy as a concierge chick at a charity golf tournament. What?? Too soon??
Atlanta (-4) over Miami: Miami can’t possibly sustain last year’s level, and while Michael Turner will be about as productive as my 1996 Chevy Cavalier was in 2007 (no AC, no heat, leaking coolant, etc.) by week 3, Tony G catches a couple of TDs in this one.
Kansas City (+10.5) over Baltimore: Only Chiefs fans are so jaded as to chant “homer” when someone picks their team to stay within double digits of an opponent. My god this team is pathetic. Over under on snaps taken by Chiefs QBs on Sunday: Cassel -12, Croyle – 2, Thigpen – 15, Colquitt – 22.
Carolina (+1) over Philadelphia: Too much running game for Philly to handle. Plus I hate Mizzou, and thus will never root for J-Mac (unless he signs with the Chiefs). Maybe my hatreds of teams/people is one of the reasons I am not any good at picking games. Fuck it.
Cincinnati (-4) over Denver: See? Here I go again. I just cannot pick the stupid Broncos. Although, at least I have an excuse this season; Kyle Orton. Good God, the Broncos organization actually makes me proud to be a Chiefs fan.
Cleveland (+4) over Minnesota: Exhibit C in the case against Logg picking against teams for no reason other than I hate them. I lived in Minnesota for 10 years, and I have never met a more obnoxious group of fans. At the beginning of every season, I say a little prayer for Gary Anderson missing the kick in the 1998 playoffs that would have sent the Vikings to the Super Bowl. Thank you Gary. Oh, and Adrian Peterson will not play a full season this year. You heard it here first.
NY Jets (+4.5) over Houston: How can you pick against Mark “Dirty” Sanchez. Watch for him to pull it out and smear it on the Texans. By the way, I think it should be against the rules to name an expansion franchise after a team that already existed in a different city. I am looking in your direction, Texans.
Indianapolis (-7) over Jacksonville: I don’t know. Manning at home? Seems like a good enough reason.
Detroit (+13) over New Orleans: Detroit is my sleeper team. I am feeling four wins out of them. Hopefully two will be against those damned Vikings!!! Okay, calm down… Anyway, 13 points on an NFL game?? C’mon Vegas, is that the best you can do?
Dallas (-5.5) over Tampa Bay: I have no idea what Dallas is going to be like this year. I have no idea if Jerry Jones is actually still alive, or if they are just pulling a “Weekend At Bernie’s” thing. What I do know is that Tampa will stink.
San Francisco (+6.5) over Arizona: You know what happens to teams that lose the super bowl
Washington (+6.5) over NY Giants: Who is Manning going to throw the ball to again? The Giants open at home, but in the end they shoot themselves in the foot. What? Too soon? Whatever.
St. Louis (+7.5) over Seattle: I am totally getting some for this pick. Boo ya!
Green Bay (-3.5) over Chicago: Jay Cutler. That’s about all I have on this one. I do hope Robbie Gould has a huge day for the sake of a couple of my fantasy teams, though.
Buffalo (+10.5) over New England: Again, that’s a lot of points to lay on a Monday night game. TO will have a big game or something. I don’t even know who is throwing the ball to him. Does Bernard Pollard play for the Bills by chance?
San Diego (-9.5) over Oakland: I truly have no idea what the spread would have had to be for me to pick the Raiders. 20? 25? Terrible.
So that is that. Feel free to post any of your picks below. If you’re good enough, you’ll be able to tell that cute chick at the bar, “Yeah, I beat the Logg.” Enjoy the games.
